it's official, Kaneel is the new king of masturbation, in a stunning feat of endurance and determination ... read on if you must

further records can be found here ...

do i need and excuse? or should I just say Rachel Stevens : Sweet dreams La Ex (real player)
The newest girl band to hit the british block is Clea with there video Download it
A couple of classics Groove Armada Supa Stylin - Groove Armada My Friend (i couldn't find shakin that ass)

WOW - EALA, the studio formerly known as EA Pacific, has already produced Command & Conquer: Generals, and has already moved on to production of its next all-new game, The Lord of the Rings: The Battle for Middle-Earth. The game will be powered by an enhanced version of the 3D engine that the studio used for Generals and will feature huge battles based on what executive producer Mark Skaggs describes as "the biggest battles from the Lord of the Rings movies."

screenshots that I think makes it look more total war or WC3 engine behind it




BabySmasher.com launched today, sparking instant interest from around the world. Hits have already been recorded from the USA, Sweden, Canada, Australia, Japan, Norway, the United Kingdom, Finland, Italy, Ireland, and New Zealand.
Our crusade to educate the masses about the true use of "baby changing stations" is off to a wonderful start!

more job info if you are unhappy at work ..

you could have one of these jobs




not sure why I found this funny but ... highway blocked by 800 baby pigs

this is so cool -

Vanuatu has unveiled what it claims to be the world's first underwater post office, providing jobs for four dive-accredited postal workers operating in shifts. But it isn't as silly as you might think - provided you buy special waterproof postcards available from shops on terra firma in Port Vila. Then you scuba dive three metres down to have your postcards embossed with a waterproof stamp, specially created by Vanuatu Post to celebrate the 83-island archipelago's status as a marine paradise see below ...





finally are leased lines on their last legs? - from ZDNet.co.uk

Sometimes you need a modicum of luck to go for you. saturday afternoon, Chelski had more than that – we had a guardian Angel. Juan Pablo Angel’s two glaring misses coupled with in-form striker Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink’s first-half winner was the difference between the two teams.
another victory and 3 points for the chelski revolution and the bandwagon keeps on rolling :) hard earned victory but these were the type of games we lost last year, watched the highlights on itv and listened live in the afternoon on the radio and apart from 3 good chances they wasted thought it was a good result (still in 2nd place, a point behind the leaders).
JFH comes up trumps again ...



Unhappy at work? Maybe you'd like one of these jobs...

wtf ??? - biologist Dmitri Ivanov secretly cloned his cancer-riddled wife Katrina in 1965, in an experiment that seemed to end happily when he married the dead woman's genetic duplicate just days after she turned 18

court in northern Saudi Arabia has sentenced a Nigerian teenager to six months in jail and 240 lashes for trying to have sex with a camel, Al-Iqtissadiya newspaper reported Sunday

Sherman Austin is looking forward to a year in federal prison with the kind of equanimity that most people reserve for a trip to the doctor's office.
The 20-year-old anarchist was charged with distributing information about Molotov cocktails and "Drano bombs" on his Web site, raisethefist.com. Under a 1997 federal law championed by Sen. Dianne Feinstein, D-Calif., it is illegal to publish such instructions with the intent that readers commit "a federal crime of violence."

I don't know how it gets there, but sometimes I find spyware loaded on my system. Weird little applications designed to, well, I don't care what they were designed to do. I want them off. Maybe I'll leave the cookies, but the rest of it? I want it off my system.
So what is spyware? Well I nicked the following directly from the Spywareinfo.com site.

Spyware is software or hardware installed on a computer without the user's knowledge which gathers information about that user for later retrieval by whomever controls the spyware.
Spyware can be broken down into two different categories, surveillance spyware and advertising spyware.
Surveillance software includes key loggers, screen capture devices, and trojans. These would be used by corporations, private detectives, law enforcement, intelligence agencies, suspicious spouses, etc.
Advertising spyware is software that is installed alongside other software or via activex controls on the internet, often without the user's knowledge, or without full disclosure that it will be used for gathering personal information and/or showing the user ads. Advertising spyware logs information about the user, possibly including passwords, email addresses, web browsing history, online buying habits, the computer's hardware and software configuration, the name, age, sex, etc of the user.
As with spam, advertising spyware uses the CPU, RAM, and resources of the user's computer, making the user pay for the costs associated with operating it. It then makes use of the user's bandwidth to connect to the internet and upload whatever personal information it has gathered, and to download advertisements which it will present to the user, either by way of pop up windows, or with the ad banners of ad-supported software. All of this can be considered theft in the cases of advertising spyware that installs without disclosure.

Since spyware constantly changes and evolves, you have to download updates for your spyware removal tools. I run not one, but two spyware removers in the hope that between the two, I'll nail all the weirdness on my system. Sometimes one finds something the other doesn't. The two tools?

Ad-Aware
Spybot Search and Destroy

If you haven't run a spyware checker before, you'll be shocked at how much there is on your system.

nice article from chris

uk readers will be aware of jordan as a silicone-enhanced model sprawled across the covers of the cheaper tabloids. We may mock her, but kittens worship her as a GOD, as revealed by Mr Wheatley

this has got to be seen to be believed its black mesa disco inferno flash (use your mouse to find the hitten buttons)

this week, weebl and bob are faced with an intriguing dilemma, involving a pie. a bit of a return to old-school weebl. ace.

harking back to the days when having a website was a big deal, this company has the most extraordinarily portentous Flash intro ever, particularly for a company that sells chinchillas.

the internet is full, will someone please delete some stuff? like this comprehensive guide on how to shave a cat's nose? mind you, we hate hairy nosed cats, so maybe not, print it out first. you never know when society will collapse and you'll need that information and i don't want to be the one to say told you so

finally if my inane drivel has not sent you to sleep yet try the age-old methods of counting sheep

some, none or all of the above extracted from that wonder site known as b3ta.com

out of respect for my good friends marc and jo and their loss, all my thoughts are with you guys and your family

after Mark Poom's goal at the weekend, TheFA.com looks back at past keepers who have turned into goalscoring heroes...

I can't believe it but the film that gave me sleepless nights and nightmares is being remade and released all up-to-date :( , back in the 70's when special effects were pretty crap Texas Chainsaw massacre frightened the life out of me, unquestionably one of the greatest horror films ever made, the blueprint for a generation of horror filmmakers. A terrifyingly dark film it has passed into folklore and stamped its title on a million quips. Mere reference to the title is in itself iconic. Never more will you think of a chainsaw without thinking of Leatherface. I for one will not be revisiting that film but will sit down with a nice cup of tea and slippers and watch this

Ahhh, now I know why some men buy BMWs (not really safe for work) if they can afford it. Although, to the untrained eye of someone like me, I am guessing that the interior shown here is NOT that of a Beamer but of something else. Any experts want to share their opinions?

from amazon - Key Tronic E05305US205-C 104-Key Keyboard Win95 PS/2 L-Shape Enter Key from $14.78 - read the customer reviews they are hilarious

found this on link swarm and its amazing, the trampoling-bear, downloads a little slow but well worth the wait

WTF ??? police officer who pretended to a man and woman that they had to supply a sample of their pubic hair before they could become police informants appeared in the Brisbane District Court on 20 charges yesterday.

Long Island school board has voted to end a high school football team's season amid allegations that some players were sexually assaulted by older teammates at a training camp. (sort of NSFW)

... and lastly, you know that you used to do this with your sister's Barbie dolls when you were younger: Barbie and Ken getting down and dirty (probably not safe for work).

watched the moan united vs. arse game yesterday and was applled at the last 10 mins, all this fuss about the referee b4 the game started and turns out that certain so-called proffesional players wearing yellow reduced the game to sunday morning pub team standards, what on earth happened in this game ?

The first half had 1 minute of stoppage time which showed how disciplined things were proceeding and then as each team applied the pressure in the second half the sparks began to fly. Viera had made several hard challenges during the game before finally giving in to a silly impulse to get his marching orders - Keown should hang his head in shame as a disgraceful example to the youngsters at old Trafford that afternoon - he was probably more angry with himself at giving away a stupid penalty after forcing Forlan to the floor with his arm but chose instead to turn that energy on RVNistelrooy for the Viera incident.

The subsequent anger at Ruud after the match was disgraceful and all credit to the Dutchman for walking away from it. It would have been easier to hang around and goad the Londoners in the midst of their display of immaturity - I for one will be mistified if Keowns arm contact on RVN's head or the shove on RVN after the final wistle goes unpunished. I'm sure most of us would be able to handle all sorts of punishement and public humiliation before reacting if we were paid as much as these guys.

in other news ...

monk narrowly escapes disembowelment, and all he ends up with is a cruddy white robe and straw sandals

Wi-Fi spray - just one spray speeds up your Internet connection...

I guess we know what makes it an exceptional massage

finally GQ magazine's girl of the year is Heidi Klum and she certainly gets my vote :)

the lion is close to extinction in Africa, a wildlife expert has warned after numbers fell by 90 percent during the last 20 years

where as this seems to be :) Fudgey Nut works hard to make your gift-giving experience easy and successful for all involved. We call this "The Fudgey Nut Experience."

carrying on the fudgey experience for you - leak in an aircraft sewerage system could have created the "bomb" of smelly flying waste that hit a house in a rural part of Wellington yesterday

In June earlier this year, Steve Jobs (Apple CEO) told the audience that the company's new PowerMac G5 systems would not just match but surpass the performance of similarly equipped high-end Pentium 4 and XEON-based PCs ...... and once again, every techno-nonce with a PC problem announces as I fix his/her machine - wouldn't have this problem with a mac, now wouldya?. I usually just smile and nod at the ignoramus and show them how to disable CAPS LOCK when putting their passwords in. Idiots!!
Steve Jobs and Apple have, for years been claiming the superiority of their machines but it has always relied on rather spurious evidence, such as hand-picked benchmarks that highlighted specific strengths of the Macs. This time, however, Jobs touted a number of so-called industry standard benchmarks from Veritest which reputedly backed up Apple's claims. Has the Mac really surpassed the PC, after years of lagging behind?

NO of course not, Steve Jobs fibs !!! Almost immediately after the keynote, while Mac fanatics worldwide continued chortling over their perceived victory, people around the Web began looking into the benchmarks Apple used to prove the G5's prowess. Predictably, things aren't as simple as Apple's followers would like to believe. More alarming, even dual processor G5 machines still don't match the processing power of a single processor Pentium 4 system, contrary to what Apple announced.


Here's why: In a bit of classic benchmark trickery, Apple's systems were highly tuned in non-standard ways that would provide the best scores on specific benchmarks. Meanwhile, the PCs used to compete against the G5 were saddled with generic tools. Furthermore, advanced Pentium 4 features such as hyperthreading were actually turned off, artificially lowering that system's scores. What's most interesting is that Veritest actually has results for various Pentium 4 systems in which these features are enabled. Guess which system, Mac or PC, comes out ahead when these results are used. Hmmm, oh yeah, say it now, say it loud ...... PC, PC, PC :o)

So face it Mac User - unless you use your computer as an aesthetic chick magnet in the corner of your post modern, feng-shui, Ikea living space - escape the illusion, take the red pill and buy a PC - it's cheaper, it's faster and it's better !! ...... this is, of course only my opinion but if you hear Steve Jobs claim anything he is involved with to be the "world's fastest ....." - remember .... he fibs !!!

from Chris (and very well written)

A friend posted me this earlier, thought you might want to read it if you are bored, it made me smile.

Ultimate Computer Store Phone Conversation:

Bud: Hello, this is Bud at the Ultimate Computer Store. Can I help you?

Lou: Yes, this is Lou and I'm setting up a home office in the den, and I'm thinking of buying a computer.

Bud: Mac?

Lou: No, the name is Lou.

Bud: Your computer?

Lou: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

Bud: Mac?

Lou: I told you, my name is Lou.

Bud: What about Windows?

Lou: Why? Does it get stuffy?

Bud: Do you want a computer with Windows?

Lou: I don't know. What do I see when I look out the windows?

Bud: Wallpaper.

Lou: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

Bud: Software that runs on Windows?

Lou: No, on the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses. You know, run a business. What have you got?

Bud: Office.

Lou: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

Bud: I just did.

Lou: You just did what?

Bud: Recommended something.

Lou: You recommended something?

Bud: Yes.

Lou: For my office?

Bud: Yes.

Lou: Okay, what did you recommend for my office?

Bud: Office.

Lou: Yes, for my office.

Bud: Office for Windows.

Lou: I already have an office and it already has windows! Let's say I'm sitting at my computer, and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

Bud: Word.

Lou: If I'm writing a proposal, I'm going to need lots of words. But what program do I load?

Bud: Word.

Lou: What word?

Bud: The Word in Office.

Lou: The only word in office is office.

Bud: The Word in Office for Windows.

Lou: Which word in "office for windows?"

Bud: The Word you get when you click the blue W.

Lou: I'm going to click your big W if you don't give me a straight answer. Let's forget about words for a minute. What do I need if I want to watch a movie over the Internet?

Bud: RealOne.

Lou: Maybe a real movie, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. But what do I need to watch it?

Bud: RealOne.

Lou: If it's a long movie I'll also want to watch reels two, three and four. Can I watch reel four?

Bud: Of course.

Lou: Great! With what?

Bud: RealOne.

Lou: Okay, so I'm sitting at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?

Bud: You click the blue 1.

Lou: I click the blue one what?

Bud: The blue 1.

Lou: Is that different from the blue W?

Bud: Of course it is. The blue 1 is RealOne. The blue W is Word.

Lou: What word?

Bud: The Word in Office for Windows.

Lou: But there's three words in "office for windows!"

Bud: No, just one. But it's the most popular Word in the world.

Lou: It is?

Bud: Yes, although to be fair there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words.

Lou: And that word is the real one?

Bud: No. RealOne has nothing to do with Word. RealOne isn't even part of Office.

Lou: Never mind; I don't want to get started with that again. But I also need something for bank accounts, loans, and so on. What do you have to help me track my money?

Bud: Money.

Lou: That's right. What do you have?

Bud: Money.

Lou: I need money to track my money?

Bud: No, not really. It comes bundled with your computer.

Lou: What comes bundled with my computer?

Bud: Money.

Lou: Money comes bundled with my computer?

Bud: Exactly. No extra charge.

Lou: I get a bundle of money with my computer at no extra charge? How much money do I get?

Bud: Just one copy.

Lou: I get a copy of money. Isn't that illegal?

Bud: No. We have a license from Microsoft to make copies of Money.

Lou: Microsoft can license you to make money?

Bud: Why not? They own it.

Lou: Well, it's great that I'm going to get free money, but I'll still need to track it. Do you have anything for managing your money?

Bud: Managing Your Money? That program disappeared years ago.

Lou: Well, what do you sell in its place?

Bud: Money.

Lou: You sell money?

Bud: Of course. But if you buy a computer from us, you get it for free.

Lou: That's all very wonderful, but I'll be running a business. Do you have any software for, you know, accounting?

Bud: Simply Accounting.

Lou: Probably, but it might get a little complicated.

Bud: If you don't want Simply Accounting, you might try M.Y.O.B.

Lou: M.Y.O.B.? What does that stand for?

Bud: Mind Your Own Business.

Lou: I beg your pardon?

Bud: No, that would be I.B.Y.P. I said M.Y.O.B.

Lou: Look, I just need to do some accounting for my home business. You know--accounting? You do it with money.

Bud: Of course you can do accounting with Money. But you may need more.

Lou: More money?

Bud: More than Money. Money can't do everything.

Lou: I don't need a sermon! Okay, let's forget about money for the moment. I'm worried that my computer might...what's the word? Crash. And if my computer crashes, what can I use to restore my data?

Bud: GoBack.

Lou: Okay. I'm worried about my computer smashing and I need something to restore my data. What do you recommend?

Bud: GoBack.

Lou: How many times do I have to repeat myself?

Bud: I've never asked you to repeat yourself. All I said was GoBack.

Lou: How can I go back if I haven't even been anywhere? Okay, I'll go back. What do I need to write a proposal?

Bud: Word.

Lou: But I'll need lots of words to write a proposal.

Bud: No, you only need one Word, the Word in Office for Windows.

Lou: But there are three words in...Oh, never mind. (CLICK)

Bud: Hello? Hello? Lou? Why do they always hang up on me?

Premiership needs more refs like this

Stealth Disco started as a prank between employees at an advertising agency in Chicago, working in advertising means plenty of long hours so you've got to find a way to have some fun, "you know when you've been stealthed"

also be careful out there on the ice young eskimo

lastly all those japanese shadow skits that have become so popular

Quickly, follow this link to ebay and snap yourself up a bargain ;o)

Silly things said in americas law courts from here

Was that the same nose you broke as a child?

Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about it until the next morning?

What happened then?
He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me."
Did he kill you?

Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?

The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?

Were you alone or by yourself?

What is the meaning of sperm being present?
It indicates intercourse.
Male sperm?
That is the only kind I know.

------------------------------------------------------

have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F and G are the letter used to define bra sizes?

If you have wondered why, but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for...

It is about time you became informed!

{A} - Almost Boobs...

{B} - Barely there.

{C} - Can't Complain!

{D} - Damn!

{DD} - Double damn!

{E} - Enormous!

{F} - Fake

{G} - GEEEEzus Christ!

.

You know, it isn't often that I see something that warms my heart these days. It isn't often we witness acts of dedication and bravery by our fellow man so great as to bring a tear to the eye.

Well in the last day or so I have.

Yes, as you have probably guessed, I am referring to David Blaine's much-publicised attempt to break the stupidity record once again by spending 44 days suspended over the Thames in a magical glass box of pointlessness. Well, more specifically, I am referring to the various heroes and heroines who have travelled to ground-stupid from all over London to make his life hell!
They started on day one by throwing eggs at him as he tried to wave, they quickly moved on to bottles as they got drunker, and they even had a good go at hitting golf balls at him from Tower bridge. This they kept up until he tried to ignore them and get some sleep… at which point they woke him up by banging on a big drum all night. I salute each and every one of them. Let's hope that, unlike Hugh Hefner, who is allegedly/probably wielding a comatose member, they can keep it up for 44 days!


Pop Idol's Simon Cowell has been upsetting people with his sharp comments again. Well, the way I see it there's no point in getting upset about it when you can just take the piss back. Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present Wasted Network's Simon-Cowell-Come-Back generator...

Simon says... Appropriate come back...

"My advice would be if you want to pursue a career in the music business, don't!"
"But surely, Simon, you are living proof that talent less people can make it in the industry?"

"If you had been singing like this two thousand years ago, people would have stoned you."
"If you had worn your trousers up like that two thousand years ago, you would still have been 50 years behind the fashions."

"If you can find someone who sings worse than you, then I'll let you go through to the next round."
"Hmm, do you know Geri Halliwell's number?"

"Don't take this the wrong way, but I prefer you when I close my eyes."
"You know, I said the exact same thing in bed with your mother last night."

"If your lifeguard duties were as good as your singing, a lot of people would be drowning."
"If your swimming skills matched your wit, you would be one of them."

"If you looked how you sang, you'd be bloody ugly!"
"If you sang how you dress, you would be Boy George."

"You had about as much passion as a kitten mewing."
"Passionate mewing? What have you been doing to kittens, Simon?"

Alternatively, you could simply use the all-purpose retort… Oh, fuck off, you 80's haired, armpit-trousered, nancy-boy.

credit to wasted network

The parents of 15-year-old leukaemia patient Josh Morten, who last night passed away after a four year battle with the illness, said they were sorry not to have fulfilled his dying wish to get a blow job from Cameron Diaz.

Your Airline: One of the rare luxuries of economy class air travel occurs when you have a whole row of seats to yourself. You can raise the armrests and, if all goes well, sleep the hours away.

In order to keep people spilling out, the armrests on the aisles can't move. This makes perfect sense... but why are the armrests next to the window also immobilized? Even with all three seats at your disposal, if you're more than 5 feet tall, or if you're sitting next to someone and want to lean against the wall, that armrest jabs you in the guts with relentless spite. Why can't I raise it?

heard on the radio this morning, following European Commission legislation, all owners of horses, ponies, donkeys and mules in the UK will need to have applied for a passport for their equine by December 31st 2003, this is true !!

what worries me is what is this going to cost Boots and other oulets that have photo-booths as surely they are going to have to increase the size of these now and as for the clearing up after the flash goes off

Stumbled on this page looking for something else but the article about "Guns and Jesus" caught my eye. Thought at first it might be a new Christian Rock Band - W.W.J.P. ("What Would Jesus Pack?") indeed!

full credit to something awful and its contributors this week, two of (imho) the funnier motivational posters they produced ...




MISHAWAKA, Ind. - Two would-be robbers left an Indiana convenience store empty-handed after getting into an argument about the contents of a note they handed to the clerk. The two men entered the 7-Eleven store in Mishawaka, just east of South Bend, early Tuesday morning. They left the store and came back a few minutes later. One of them handed the clerk a note saying, in part, "put it in the bag."
When the clerk said she didn't understand what that meant, the man who handed her the note said he didn't know either because his buddy wrote it. The two men began to argue and left the store. They are still at large

Führer or faker you decide :)

friday's filly has to be the latest photo-shoot from rolling stone magazine ...



OMG what a picture, the lighting, the camera work, those tan lines :)

england 2 leichtenstein 0 goals from owen and rooney see us close to that euro 2004 spot with us only need ing a draw in turkey to ansure we finsih top of our group ... makes good reading , heh? not if you look at the facts it doesn't ...

england beat 7 professionals, 2 students , a bank clerk and a goalie that looked like a girl by only 2 goals !!!

turkey beat them them away 3-0 and at home demolished them 5-0 yet we only manage 2 !!!!

James 8/10 not a lot to do but showed he was still sharp at end of game
Neville 4/10 caught out of position and crosses were awful
Terry 7/10 didn't have to do much but was there when needed
Upson 8/10 solid performance
Bridge 5/10 not up to his usual premiership standard
Beckham 6/10 no passion, yellow card obviously on his mind (sub Hargreaves 7/10 tryied hard when all around him had finished game)
Gerrard 6/10 excellent cross for first goal didn't do much else (sub Neville P 6/10 effective)
Lampard 5/10 see Bridge
Owen 6/10 tried hard, good goal but squandered many chances when lay-off wold have been better
Beattie 3/10 showed he is not quite international standard yet, will get there


Rooney 15/10 awesome, passionate, proud to pull on england shirt enuf said (sub Cole 7/10 looked promising needs full game)

Strongbad's version of a kids book - bloody hilarious

americans can't find Osama or Saddam, but at least the law can nail the real criminals - makes my blood boil

when nature talks back :)

unbelievable - There's no tedious 9 month wait, you can drink, smoke, party and/or diet to your heart's content, and with YPL Rent-a-Rat you'll never have to deal with unreliable surrogate moms, sloppy fertility clinics, or even ever have sex again!

this collection of fetus-themed soaps are ideal for bathtime with the kids. There's even a cojoined twins version. Educational and hygenic.


apparently the latest Korean craze, as demonstrated in this great series of photos of people pretending to be corpses

tampon henge (a sanitary landmark)

yeeeewwww - Demodex folliculorum, or the demodicid, is a tiny mite, less than 0.4 mm long, that lives in your pores and hair follicles, usually on the nose, forehead, cheek, and chin, and often in the roots of your eyelashes

OMG I think I have gone to heaven, well close anyway take a look here and then feast your eyes on this

This is true but not for the squeamish among us........

This poor guy was minding his own business when he felt an eye irritation. Thinking that it was just regular dust, he started to rub his eye, in an effort to remove the dust. Then his eyes got really red, so he bought some eye drops from the pharmacy - read on mcduff

a frightened boy, indeed

new action figure of a frumpy-looking librarian who moves her index finger to her lips with "amazing push-button shushing action!" is prompting librarians around the world to raise their voices in protest (an "amazing push-button shushing action" fantastic) - "The shushing thing just put me right over the edge," said Diane DuBois, library director of Caribou Public Library in Caribou ... SHUSH !!!!

What happens when bored morons get hold of a geographical database? Brilliant website listing complete list of rude place names, ranging from the innocuous innuendo straight through to words that... err. They're just words, dammit. It may amuse you for upwards of three seconds. It's so puerile it deserves its own series on E4

LOL ... Sellers at auction house eBay have taken to surreptitiously taking photos of themselves reflected naked in the surface of whatever trinket they've put up for auction. The practice, known as Reflectoporn, has become a way for exhibitionists to get themselves seen by people around the world.

Unsuspecting eBay users may not immediately register a naked body reflected in the polished surface of a kettle. But at second glance, the image of a podgy nude man clasping a camera is difficult to forget.

The creators of Reflectoporn are finding increasingly inventive ways to unleash their exhibitionist urges. Naked reflections have appeared on electric guitars, toasters and even cutlery.

An eBay spokesman said users are banned from selling erotica or sexually oriented materials, and aren't allowed to depict genitalia. "If we become aware of any item listed for sale on the site that breaches this policy, it will be removed."

find more about this here and here

I don't think this game is safe for work, and it's certainly beyond description

"With this you can have a really good car on the road, and an exciting toy that can tow a water skier, that you can commute to work with, that you can go to St. Tropez with and take two girlfriends," the firm's chairman Alan Gibbs told reporters at the car's test drive on London's Thames on Wednesday - I want one now please ??


everything you ever wanted to know (and a lot you didn't) about down there

errrr ... don't now what to say about this or why I found it - move on quickly

bet they don't shove their partners head under the covers after though :)

is this a story about a grounded yacht or a lame excuse to .... and another one here of some guards

ouch that had to hurt

one of the most disturbing things you'll ever see....

finally ...

boy's birthday party spoiled when all the go-carts are rented. Mom saves the day by buying the boys beer, renting a hotel room, giving them $1 bills and putting on strip tease for them

... finally pt II ...

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

What is the parking situation like at the Special Olympics?

How come stealing from one book is plagiarism, but stealing from many is research?

Is there anything easier done than said?

Don't you find it weird we teach our kids: scrub a dub dub, three men in a tub?

How come when you go in the front door of a church, you are at the back of the church, and if you go in the back door, you would end up in the front of the church?

Why is there an L in NOEL?

Arghh !!!! aliens arrived in central london this sunday, well they would have frightened the sh*t out of me if I'd been there :)



actually it was part of the mock terrorist attack that has been staged at a central London Underground station, to see how emergency services would cope with the real thing

what an asshat pt. I - one thing not to do with a firecracker

what an asshat pt. II - 21 year-old Thai computer engineer faces up to five years in prison for poaching used women's underwear and selling them through his Internet website

Petra Verkaik has been "blessed" in many ways. Petra is an all natural beauty, she's had no cosmetic surgery of any kind. Her dark, stunning looks and statuesque body have earned her the title of most published model in Playboy history

Princess Madeleine: Clever girl with loads of money and stunning cleavage

wtf - evil roleplaying games are sliding our children on a greased pole straight to the FLAMES of HELL for ETERNAL TORMENT, Satan laughing aloud at this! Those who play these satanic games are actually WORSHIPPING SATAN!

about bloody time too - headteachers could be asked to consider staggering timetables to try to ease traffic congestion caused by the school run

my hearse is registered as a car honest officer - a motorbiking vicar has complained about being held up by police who stopped him with a coffin in his sidecar which he was taking to a funeral

one of the best adverts ever here - nike musical chairs

oh Weebl Weebl Weebl. What has he done? he's spent two days locked in his bedroom singing "badger badger badger badger badger badger MUSHROOM!" that's what

apparently George W. Bush is planning to make a UK visit in the autumn. Manic wants you to show him your arse, I don't give a stuff about politics but I do like the idea of turning a state visit into a PR disaster

This is priceless and true and I got it from the News Quiz programme on BBC Radio 4 last night.

An amendment slip relating to a Sexual Offences Bill being tabled before the House of Lords contained this:

Page 32 paragraph 3 line 3

extract genitals inset penis

I wonder if anyone even thought what they were doing when they wrote that?

Roll over in your fat-lined grave, Dr. Atkins, there's a new diet guru in town and his name is ParallelJoe. His book, titled "The Awful Diet", is sweeping the country faster than bullets through the Hussein brothers - made me laugh anyway

SMELLY FART wins man £60,000

A Swedish man has been awarded nearly £60,000 compensation after he was sacked for telling off a colleague for breaking wind. Computer technician Goran Andervass took the Swedish Bank, at Riksbanken, to industrial tribunal for unfair dismissal. He said he rebuked his un-named colleague because he believed he had deliberately broken wind in his office. "My colleague was absolutely aware of the awful smell. It was pure provocation," he told Aftonbladet. "I felt provoked by the fart at 7.30am and it made me terribly angry."

The colleague complained to management who suspended Mr Andervass and later made him redundant. He took legal action and was recently awarded the equivalent of £58,000. Krister Skoglund, of the Swedish Work Environment Authority, commented: "If a fart is done on purpose when going into somebody's office it is important that management takes the matter seriously full story here

Newlyweds can now discover if they are destined for the divorce courts by applying a mathematical model that can predict whether their marriage will succeed


from an excellent site called the blue brick

mcdonald’s “Happy Meals” to include share of worldCom or enron stock - “it’s cheaper than those little toys”, says fast-food giant
what an excellent idea - man cultivates acne to keep youthful appearance
now who does this remind me of - men pretends to listen, one-night stand ensues

i'll leave you with a few thoughts ...

saw a couple of adverts the other day:-
used gravestone for sale - ideal gift for family called Smith (nice)
wedding dress for sale - Size 28 - never worn (you do surprise me)
if people say that swimming is good for you...how came whales are so fat eh?
and when people are looking for something and they finally find it, why do they say it was in the last place that they looked - of course it was, you don't carry on looking after you've found it do you?

Ok I'm back now, whew what a week and it's only thursday :) over 1000 e-mails waiting at work, a new starter to look after and the telephone didn't stop ...

anyway onto more important things ...

what did I miss whilst away ??

Britney , Madonna and Christina kiss fest ;o)



Rachel starts BIG school today :) very excited and can't wait to get home and hear how her first day went ... got all her school uniform through yesterday and how grown up they look expect some pictures tomorrow

found a good little game of dodge ball to try here

25 ways to die ... need I say more ?

promote the goodness of Beer with the spirit of unity, peace, goodwill and charity

each work is created on an Etch-A-Sketch that take between 60-70 hours to complete, pretty impressive

amazing how stupid some people can be - doh! man steals GPS tracking device

before you ask NO I will not be trying any of these

TOP 10 REASONS DOGS DON'T USE COMPUTERS

10.) Can't stick their heads out of Windows `95.
9.) Fetch command not available on all platforms.
8.) Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side.
7.) Too difficult to "mark" every website they visit.
6.) Involuntary tail wagging is dead giveaway that they're browsing www.pethouse.com instead of working.
5.) Keep bruising noses trying to catch that MPEG frisbee.
4.) Three words: Carpal Paw Syndrome
3.) Annoyed by lack of newsgroup, alt.pictures.master's.leg.
2.) Butt-sniffing more direct and less deceiving than online chat rooms.

and the Number 1 Reason Dogs Don't Use Computers...
1.) TrO{gO DsA[M,bN HyAqR4tDc TgrOo TgYPmE WeIjTyH P;AzWqS,. *
* 1. Too Damn Hard To Type With Paws.

did I mention that kiss ??

well we are back ... refreshed sun-tanned and ready to go (back on holiday that is) ...



just a quick post for now will post more when have caught up later in the week ...

missed the win over liverpool but manged to catch the two home games live on spanish tv in menorca (why can't we have live games on a saturday over here?) saw the win against leicester and the poor draw against blackburn (when are we going to beat them at the bridge?)

family all really enjoyed the holiday, 2 min walk from centre and resturants, excellent food and cheap vino and even had 2 goes at scuba-diving which I throughly enjoyed, pictures are in gallery section

back to work tomorrow to see what's happening, cya laterz