Camera on a conveyor at a Tokyo sushi bar. It was about midnight and the place was packed with people

1) Jack Sheppard: The Jessica Fletcher for a new generation. I’m sure that many of you remember good old Jessica from the “Murder, She Wrote” TV show. Here a corpse. There a corpse. Everywhere she went was another corpse. Similar thing with Jack. Want to meet your future wife? Check out the spinal cord unit of your hospital. Need a way off the tropical island? The leader of the people who have the only form of transportation just happens to have a tumor on his spine. About to commit suicide? Well, coincidentally an accident complete with spinal trauma happens right next to you. The other Losties really need to start wearing back braces whenever they are around him.

2) How about that accident? Jack drives out on a bridge in Los Angeles in the middle of the night and parks it to read a newspaper clipping. (By the way, Jack your high mounted brakelight doesn’t seem to be working.) There isn’t another car around once he actually throws it in park. Finally, one car cruises by. He gets out, walks to the side and climbs up. Once again, not another car around. Then, when he’s just about to do a Greg Louganis to the pavement below, a car comes by. The driver is distracted by Jack and gets into an accident. But wait! Not only is there a one car accident, but later on we find out that a van comes along and plows into the car. Apparently there isn’t much traffic on the roads of L.A., but when there is, watch out! They’re not good drivers.

3) O.K., let’s talk about Jack’s newspaper clipping some more. He’s on an international flight and gets handed a Los Angeles newspaper. There, right in the section it’s folded to, is a rather lengthy column on someone’s recent death. Must be someone rather important to rate an article under the “Los Angeles County” heading, right? And with details about their background, this is no random transient! I bet their funeral will be packed. Well, no. The viewing is held in some dinky little funeral home that only provides folding chairs for the mourners and not a single person other than Jack shows up. Classy neighborhood too. Reminded me of some of the street scenes from The Blues Brothers. Doesn’t seem to mesh in my mind. But, it was kinda nice to see Jack rockin’ out on his way there.

4) You would think that with Jack’s record as a surgeon, he would know his way around a coffin. However, when he does show up, he heads over and leans over toward the foot section of it. Maybe he should have let the funeral director open it up after all. It’s a shame those things don’t come with “This End Up” markings.

5) Oceanic Airlines really needs a new marketing department. “O.K., so you just survived a horrible mid-air breakup of one of their planes and spent 3+ months being terrorized on a remote island. What can we do to make it up to you? I know, we’ll give you a Gold Pass so that you can take all the free flights you want!!!” Kinda reminds me of the Match.com ads where they say “If you don’t find your match in 6 months, we’ll give you an additional 6 months free.” Uh, excuse me, but if your service sucked so bad the first time, why would I want more of it?

6) So, how would you like to get the seat next to Jack? I just picture some little old couple taking a trip to Australia. It’s their 50th wedding anniversary, so their kids chipped in and bought them a vacation. First class all the way. Then, on the way home, they’re seated by Jack. “Oh, excuse me young man, are you heading back home to Los Angeles?” “Yes ma’aam.” “Oh, how nice! Were you in Australia for business or pleasure?” “Neither ma’am. I just fly around all the time hoping that the plane will crash. You see, after the last Oceanic crash I was on, they gave me this Gold Pass and… wait… did you feel that? Ma’am? Ma’am? O.K. everybody, stand back! I’m a doctor!!!”

7) No wonder that Ben was a “Work Man” just like his dear old dad. He’s planning his big intercept of the Losties. He’s lived on the island for about 30 years and knows the place like the back of his hand! He knows where they are going and wants to calculate the quickest intercept route. He has his map of the island. He has his straight edge. So, he whips out his red grease pencil and makes a couple of intersecting lines on it. Uh, excuse me, but what the hell did that accomplish? Wouldn’t it have been better to just start walking?

8) Good old Charlie. He gets the award for most pointless death ever. Desmond’s premonition had already proven incorrect with the “you flip the switch and then you drown.” line, so he should have known that Desmond ain’t exactly Creskin the Magnificent. So, why follow it all the way through and drown? Even if they didn’t want to just free breathe it back up, they had SCUBA gear. Plus, the door to the communications room opened into the sub pen, so he wasn’t trapped by the water pressure. If I was Charlie, when Patchy let go of the grenade’s spoon, I would have flipped him the bird right before he blew up, strolled out to the sub pen, slammed the door and secured it and then had a leisurely swim to the surface with Des. And, by the way, what’s with the flashing yellow light to show that the system is active? Man, that would get annoying after a while. It reminded me of Homer Simpson’s “Everything’s O.K.” alarm which kept blasting as long as there wasn’t an emergency.

9) Good thing Charlie was a musician. If it had been anyone else down there, they wouldn’t have been able to peck out “Good Vibrations” on the numeric keypad. Just as well it was him anyway. The last thing I would have needed was for Charlie to have allowed Hurley come along on the venture and then have to watch him try to squeeze into a wetsuit. Pause here with that mental image for a moment.

10) Charlie and Desmond’s Star Trek moment at the communications door’s window was really touching. However, while I can reasonably picture Desmond as Kirk, I‘m having a little trouble with the whole Charlie / Spock imagery.

11) Jack’s ex-wife sure is a sweetie. “Hi Sarah. I just pulled two people out of a flaming car wreck. Can you give me a ride home?” “I don’t think that would be appropriate.” Also, why the heck was his “emergency contact” person called in the first place. It’s the freaking hospital where he worked, he wasn’t unconscious or in a life threatening situation. All he had was his arm wrapped up and a band-aid on his head. They didn’t even have to give him anesthesia or admit him. What, were they afraid that his insurance coverage had lapsed? Oh, and by the way, speaking of Jack’s band-aid, watch it closely. In between the closeup shots during his conversation with Sarah and when he stands up to leave, it somehow mysteriously triples in size, then shrinks again for the last closeup.

12) How is Kate roaming free after returning to L.A? Shouldn’t someone have cared that she was being escorted by a U.S. Marshall. Yet, it looks like they just welcomed her back, gave her her Gold Pass and wished her a nice life. How come she gets to stop running all of a sudden?

13) What’s the matter Locke, couldn’t find any dynamite or plastic explosives to take out Naomi, so you had to use your knife instead? And speaking of which, why put on the whole circus act instead of just shooting her? Seems unnecessarily dramatic.

14) How exactly did Hurley get the van restarted to come charging into the camp like the cavalry. The battery should still be stone dead. Don’t try to tell me that he shoved it down a hill by himself, ran alongside, jumped in and popped the clutch again. (Pause for unwelcome Hurley mental image number two.)

15) Good thing that The Others aren’t terribly observant. Even though they knew that Juliet had gone over to The Losties’ side and warned them, they apparently didn’t notice 40 pairs of footprints heading out of camp and down the beach together. I suppose it’s possible that the three caballeros spent their downtime erasing some of them, but that still seems like it should be pretty noticeable. I know I would have been on high alert if I thought that they had been warned.

16) Why did Naomi feel the need to tell Jack how to operate the satellite phone? Seemed pretty straightforward to me. Besides, was she expecting that something would happen to her? Oh, and by the way, why does she refer to her ship as a “freighter?” A freighter seems like kind of an odd vessel to use as a rescue ship, especially one that was equipped with a helicopter.

17) Why did the Losties haul so much luggage with them? Weren’t they expecting to be coming back to the camp in a day or two to wait for the ship to arrive? Or did they think that it was provided with a neverending supply of helicopters to ferry them around. It’s a freighter, not a freakin’ Pez dispenser. Some of those suitcases were pretty hefty too, and then you had the two “pole bearers” carrying even more junk around. Just because The Others drag Ben’s bedroom set all over creation doesn’t mean it’s a good idea. The funniest part was watching the one little blonde “extra” swinging a huge, yet obviously empty, suitcase around like it was her Prada bag.

18) Somehow, I got the distinct impression that Charlie was actually enjoying being smacked around by the two women in The Looking Glass. And why were they interrogating him by the only escape route? Are the only two rooms in the entire place the sub pen and the communications room?

19) The new Chief of Surgery refers to Jack as the hero “twice over.” Presumably the first time had to do with the rescue from the island. Good thing that the woman in the hospital was unconscious though. Nothing inspires confidence in your medical care like seeing Reverend Jim standing over your bed, looking at your chart with shaking hands, watching him down the contents of a prescription bottle like they were Tic Tacs and then hearing him say that he wants to operate on you first thing in the morning.

20) I loved the whole “Ben Lyness: Concerned Father” bit. “You locked my boyfriend in a cage and then tried to brainwash him.” “I didn’t want him to get you pregnant.” I think we have the makings of a Dr. Phil “Fathers Who Love Too Much” special in the works!

21) What was the purpose of Ben’s game with the hostages and the walkie talkie? Once Jack thought that all three of them were dead, Ben lost his bargaining chip. Wouldn’t it have been much smarter to just kill (or pretend to kill) them one by one? At this rate, Ben is going to have to turn in his Evil Genius Club membership card soon!

22) Good thing they had Danielle along to point the way to the tower. They apparently didn’t notice the huge orange and white structure even when they were only about 50 feet away until Danielle told them “We’re here.” I guess The Others aren’t the only oblivious ones after all.

23) It was pretty disappointing to have Aaron begin crying at the moment of Charlie’s demise. Just when an episode starts rolling along well, they have to include a moment of schmaltz.

some rc plane madness from the guys at work

This one was Mikes


and this poor attempt was Hobbo's (although blame lands squarely on Mike's shoulders for that appalling attempt at a launch)

from Sand & Cotton ...

Dreams of flying ...

bring on the inflatables ....

but ....

Kuyt - £9m - 12 goals
Berbatov - £10.9m - 12 goals
Johnson - £8.6m - 11 goals
Anelka - £8m - 11 goals
Martins - £10m - 11 goals
Heskey - £5.5m - 9 goals
Samaras - £6m - 4 goals
Shevchenko - £30m - 4 goals

One player who cost £78,000 from Cork City has scored more goals in the Premiership this season than all of them.....

A virus contracted through oral sex is the cause of some throat cancers, say US scientists.
HPV infection was found to be a much stronger risk factor than tobacco or alcohol use, the Johns Hopkins University study of 300 people found.
The New England Journal of Medicine study said the risk was almost nine times higher for people who reported oral sex with more than six partners.
But experts said a larger study was needed to confirm the findings. (more here)

edit: hint to all women who are worried: Only have sex with circumcised men, your risk reduces massively, think I may get this done as its no skin off my nose :) and don't thank me for the tip :)

from the Times ...

Mike Riley, one of England’s most experienced referees, saw red when Kingsley the Lion, the home team’s mascot, got too close to the proceedings during Reading’s 1-0 victory over Newcastle United at the Madejski Stadium on Monday evening.
Apparently, one of Riley’s assistants – the one with the glasses – found Kingsley’s blue-and-white hooped shirt confusing and, on more than one occasion, almost flagged him for offside.
Riley felt forced to act and “dismissed” the King of the Jungle, which was accompanied by a roar of disapproval from the Reading fans. Kingsley, with tail between legs, had to spend the rest of the match behind one of the goals, where he was less conspicuous. Steve Coppell, the Reading manager, is to study video footage of the incident before deciding whether to take any disciplinary action. “I’m gutted,” Kingsley growled.
In future, perhaps the optically challenged assistant should bear in mind the following when attempting to distinguish between Reading’s players and the mascot: Stephen Hunt, the winger, has unkempt straggly hair, but as yet does not have a flowing mane. Marcus Hahnemann, the giant goalkeeper, might wear an XXL shirt, but Kingsley is definitely XXXXL. Reading have one of the best “fair play” records in the Barclays Premiership. Kingsley is an animal. Kingsley has four legs. At the last count, Reading’s players had only two each.

While this article may appear to be a little tongue in cheek there is a very serious aspect to it.
You have to remember that Newcastle United's Titus Bramble actually spent the entire first half marking Reading's Mascot.
It was only during the break that Glenn Roeder pointed out to Titus that Kingsley was in fact not on the Reading team that he was able to redirect his efforts.
Reports say Titus was particularly disappointed to learn this as he thought he was doing quite well against the King Of The Jungle. Video footage shows that the mascot managed to lose Bramble on only five occasions during the first 45 minutes.

The first piece of unsolicited bulk e-mail (what will come to be known as spam) is written. When it's sent two days later, more than 400 people with an Arpanet address receive a promotional message sent by Gary Thuerk, a marketer for Digital Equipment Corporation. It's been pretty much downhill from there.
The first known commercial spam appeared in 1994.
A momentary novelty, spam has morphed into a major nuisance ever since marketers and con men seized upon it as a cheap and easy way to spread the word. While normally associated with e-mail, spam infects other media as well, including cell phones, instant messaging, newsgroups and even video games.
An enormous effort has gone into combating spam and the nefarious methods used by many spammers to remain anonymous. Studies suggest that spam is costly, both in terms of lost productivity and in the equipment, software and human resources necessary to fight it. Companies and individuals do fight it, though, even if the results are generally mixed at best.
Despite the negative image of spam, there is more of it than ever. Whatever the cost to spammers in terms of creating multiple ISP accounts and employing other evasive tactics, it is more than offset by the income potential of their scheme.

When I started out in this game, the police went round in pairs and rarely appeared in the papers. There'd be stories appealing for witnesses to a crime, an Identikit photo of a suspect would be issued and an inspector would occasionally read out a short statement outside court following a successful conviction. And that was about it.
These days, there are just a handful of bobbies left on the beat, while the rest are sitting behind locked doors in police stations closed to the public - filling in forms, attending diversity seminars and suing each other for racial and sexual harassment.
Here's a handful of cases to give you a true flavour of modern policing.
- West Yorkshire Police scrambled a £3.3million, 180mph helicopter to chase two boys suspected of taking a pedalo in a boating lake without paying. The desperados were duly rounded up and charged - but whether with nicking the pedalo or pedaloing above the speed limit wasn't clear.
- Keighley Police in Yorkshire announced a crackdown on crime. Detective Chief Superintendent Roger Gasson said: "The festive season is a busy time for us. We are determined to stop offenders causing Christmas misery."
- Merseyside Police hired an American to teach coppers how to ride a bike. A spokesman said: "They'll learn how to get on and off and generally cycle along."
I don't know about you, but I could do all that when I was about seven. One minute, my dad was holding the saddle, the next he was gone.
- In Aberdeen, the evervigilant McPlod launched a campaign against a growing menace to society. Bus drivers will be charged with careless driving if they splash pedestrians by driving through puddles.
- In Staffordshire, the war on motorists has taken an exciting new twist. WPC Gibbs, Staffordshire's answer to Juliet Bravo, was driving her panda car through the village of Codsall when she spotted three boys riding a homemade go-kart. It sounds like a scene out of Just William and recalls an age when youngsters made their own amusements in the fresh air, instead of sitting in their bedrooms glued to computer screens, downloading pornography from the internet. That's not how Juliet Bravo saw it. She pulled the boys up and said they were breaking the law because they hadn't got a tax disc or insurance. After lecturing them, she took their names and addresses. A few days later, their parents received a letter informing them that their sons were guilty of antisocial behaviour.
When I was a boy, building your own kart out of planks half-inched from the nearby building site and pram wheels recovered from the local scrapyard was a rite of passage. With no brakes and rudimentary steering made from string likely to snap at any time, we were a downright menace. It was like the chariot race from Ben Hur. The only way of stopping was to hit a wall headon or slam your shoes down on to the pavement. Frankly, you were better off hitting the wall, especially as most of us had only one pair of shoes.
There was always someone limping to school with the soles and heels hanging off their Startrites, sporting a clip round the ear from their mum or dad.
- The Staffordshire Plod seem to specialise in this kind of nonsense. Sergeant Peter Davies threatened to prosecute villagers in Eccleshall for giving away bottles of sherry on tombola stalls at the village fete without a licence, contrary to Section 160 of the Licensing Act 1964. While Eccleshall, like most of rural Britain, is plagued by burglary, car crime, drugs and vandalism, Davies decided to go after the tombola barons of the WI, the Young Farmers and the Ladies' Bell-ringing Circle.
The stallholders were forced to pack up and local charities were considerably poorer as a result.

and this really takes the biscuit ...

- Cambridgeshire is plagued with illegal gipsy campsites.
But rather than do anything about that, Old Bill decided the real victims here are not the tax-paying, law-abiding locals, but the non-taxpaying, lawbreaking invaders.
The police spent £10,000 on a CD advising "travellers" of their, er, "rights". Chief Superintendent Simon Edens believes "travellers" are victims of racism, who suffer "disgusting and offensive" abuse. On which planet did he complete his diversity training? It obviously wasn't anywhere near Cambridgeshire, which is home to a massive illegal settlement at Smithy Fen, where locals have been subjected to constant antisocial behaviour and the murder of their postman since the 800 "travellers" moved in.
Otherwise, he wouldn't have had the 2,000 CDs produced in Romany. Only a handful of "travellers" speak proper Gipsy. Most of them are Irish. He'd have been better off getting Terry Wogan to voice it.

best read I have had for ages (Littlejohn's Britain)

Kingsley will be hoping to avoid censure after getting a talking-to from referee Mike Riley last night!
The official requested that Kingsley move from the side touchline to behind the goal, as his blue and white hooped strip was causing confusion.
Boss Steve Coppell said smiling, "I can see where the referee was getting confused, he does look like so many of my players!"
metro
Sky
BBC
Sky

Dave Kitson's second half strike kept the Royals in the hunt for Europe as we saw off Newcastle in an entertaining game. Kitson scored the only goal on 51 minutes after an excellent team goal, including a brilliant dummy by John Oster, and we were worthy winners.
Newcastle had a couple of great chances to equalise, but Reading were the better team, especially in the second half. Kevin Doyle had two very, very strong penalty shouts turned down, and Kitson was inches away from a second goal.
The Royals invited some United pressure onto themselves in the last few minutes with some sloppy play, but they held the upper hand for the majority of the encounter.
Their energy levels and sheer will to win gave the Toon defence all kinds of problems after the break.

Terry Venables was in attendance, and Nicky Shorey picked up Sky's man of the match award in front of the England assistant boss. He will also have been pleased that Michael Owen looked sharp as he played the full 90 minutes, but the most important outcome from a Reading perspective was the crucial victory that puts us back in the UEFA Cup places.

Reading: Hahnemann; De La Cruz, Shorey, Duberry, Ingimarsson (c); Gunnarsson (Harper 89), Oster (Bikey 90), Seol, Hunt; Doyle, Kitson (Long 89)
Subs: Federici, Halford
Booked: Hunt, Kitson

Newcastle: Harper; Solano, Carr, Bramble, Taylor; Emre (N'Zogbia 60), Sibierski (Ameobi 54), Dyer, Milner; Martins, Owen
Subs: Srnicek, Onyewu, Carroll

Ref: Old Mother Riley
Attendance: 24,109